Why I Write

I was directed from Wil Wheaton’s excellent blog to a new site entitled “Why We Write.”

There I found wonderful essays from people who make a living doing this sort of thing and was challenged to really look inside myself and figure out my own motivation for chasing after a gift I’ve so long ignored.

The passage that moved me the most was by Damon Lindelof, one of the co-creators of “Lost” who wrote,

“I write because I can’t help but make things up.

I write because I love to tell stories.

I write because my imagination compels me to do so.

I write because if I didn’t, I’d be branded a pathological liar.

Oh, and also because I’m still trying to make my dead father proud of me.

But that’s none of your goddamn business.”

Specifically, the pathological liar line. If anyone really knew the myriad of alternative universes and persons who exist only in my head I would be committed. The only difference between a writer and the clinically insane, is that writer’s begrudgingly admit that reality exists and our escapism is only in our minds. Which isn’t to say that we prefer reality, just that we write in order to drown out it’s usually bleak overtones to insert our own view of the world around us.

I overhear a conversation and without prompting my mind begins to unravel it, mix the words, edit phrases, and put it together again in what is either the best dramatic or comedic way. I regularly have conversations with myself or imaginary people as I talk out scenes in my head. I try not think about what I look like to an outsider who finds me chatting away in my car by myself. Though with the advent of Bluetooth most, I should think, believe me to be talking on the phone. It’s nice when technology can help shield what would otherwise be good grounds to call the nice men in the white suits.

Ironically, the one aspect of my psyche that back in the 30’s would have been call for some shock therapy is the one aspect that keeps me relatively sane while I trudge through the mundane nine-to-five work weeks. I may travel to distant lands and play with dragons, or come up with the funniest concept for a sitcom. The Thought Police can’t take that away from me, yet.

The main challenge will be to focus myself in to writing for a set period of time. To keep a small journal with me to scribble out thoughts and lines that (mercifully) have started again to whiz through my brain. To write down whatever comes out and edit it later. My mantra?

“Writing is easy. You only need to stare at a piece of blank paper until your forehead bleeds” ~Douglas Adams

Just kidding. I love this line but it’s not what I will write on the front page of my new moleskin to motivate me to keep getting ink on my hand. Here’s the real one:

“The scene does not have to be perfect. The scene has to be written.” ~Elizabeth Bear

And so will go my mantra for the next year. I will place no resolutions, no number counts of how many pieces of work I wish to finish. No set times for Blog posts. No pressure except to explore and relate those journeys to whomever wishes to read about them.

Now all I have to do is buy the moleskin……